Oh my goodness!
I take a small sabbatical from things to get my head together on my own stuff, and then look what I come back to at 8Things today…all I can think of is…great minds so think alike some days…here I am, in the middle of trying to redistribute my life in one way or another…and then this pops up…
1. My favorite is: you’re doing it the wrong way…or that’s not how it’s done…especially since I never do things the ‘right’ way or the way anyone else would do things…I am usually happier for it…and I am teaching that we do not live inside the box theory to my children…because for them to be “normal” and to be “just like everyone else” is actually a nightmare of mine…
2. Wait…I do sound like my mother…and I am starting to look like her too. So, I am a decent 5’11” and she’s a chubby 5’2”….It’s the arms. I have never thought I looked like anyone in my family—when I was younger I thought I looked like my Aunt Josie…when E was younger, I saw a picture of my sister J and—that’s when I realized how much she and I look like Ma…it’s in the details, the planes of the face—the structure. Well, not only do my mother’s words fly from my mouth, the intonation is there as well…which is scary at times, but as I get older and I look at my kids, I realize my mother was not crazy—we were and we were hell-bent on taking her w us—just as my kids are crazy now and they are taking me with them! What a ride!
3. I cannot say I never heard you need good grades, since I always got them anyway—I always did hear you can do better—but I never really wanted to…what I hear now is…you have to go to college, you have to go to college. Hello—I have an 8 year old who is saying right now she will not be going to college—and I am more than fine w that—because if I do things right she will be far better educated on her own than any college education would be able to give her. I hear…you need to be certified…you need a degree. Guess what…all the technical schools I’ve attended since nearly quitting high school when I agreed to take my jr and sr years together rather than get my GED did nothing but affirm what I had learned in school—not just high school, but before that too—I can get more and better information outside a classroom than I can inside the classroom…and when I learn it myself—it sticks. Period. You should read all those books by people w Asperger’s or Autism, like John Elder Robison and Temple Grandin—they do things their way because it is the only way they can. Mr Robison declined the college route—but boy, is the man intelligent and educated. Ms Grandin did go to college, as that was the only way to do the things she wanted to do, but what she has done she has done on her own terms and in her own way. I don’t care if my kids go to college or join a circus or grow cacti their whole lives on a reservation…I will love them and I will be happy for them, so long as they are doing what they want to do, so long as they are happy. Although after watching the movie ‘Avatar’ w my 8yo, I do hope my kids don’t go to jail because of my political views…
4. You can’t do that—you can’t wear that—you can’t say that—you can’t think that…more of the same…those colors do not go together…you can’t wear a black bra under a white shirt…that skirt is too short….your hair is too puffy….fit in, damn you, fit in….not in my lifetime.
5. Lately, I’ve been swimming through the quandary of … do I need to do this in order to be a ‘real writer’? Do I need classes? Do I need to join these groups, those associations? Should I have a local clique or group or something, to get feedback on my writing? Should I subscribe to this magazine or that online what have you? Do I need all this? I know I know I know…most of my 8 things here are all the same thing…this is how you do it because this is how it needs to be done. You’re not a real writer til you’re published…then hello, I was published at 16…I am a real writer and a real poet…so bite my butt…now what?
6. Of course, considering my latest bent…the food is good for you…the water is good for you…the vaccine is good for you…these rules are good for you…believe it all. Doesn’t matter that you can prove otherwise. Doesn’t matter other countries are proving otherwise every single day (like Brazil and their ethanol production…who else has heard of this in mainstream USA?) Big Brother does know best, right? Snarf!
7. You have to be financially secure is a good one there too. You have to have money to do this. You have to be rich to go there. Although I do worry somewhat, because I am a mother and I do have people who depend upon me, I do not spend much time worrying and I try not to focus on money money money…as I teach my children, being happy is far more important. You can have all the money in the world –then the economy can crash and you find out you have nothing at all—except the people who love you. If a nuclear war breaks out—or if aliens attack and take over the world—or if the machines really do strive to eliminate humanity—is your money going to save you then? Nope. The people you love will…but money won’t mean too much then. Yes, I teach my children this stuff. Happiness over financial gain—you bet I do.
8. You are too old to do that, to dress that way, to think that way. You need to be doing x,y,z at your age, not that. It’s time for you to set your silly dreams aside and take a look at your life. Be realistic. Dude. I am realistic. Very much so. Trust me. If I wanted to live your life your way—I would. If I wanted to fall back into the ‘Barbie cycle’, I would. (Barbie, you know, the bitch has everything…especially the house, the car, the man, the kids, the white picket fence, the dog, and cat, and any job she wants…while maintaining the perfect home, yada yada yada…why do ya’ll think I got married to such an idiot that last time anyway? Because I fell for the Barbie dream…and w all things like that, dare I say as w all things Barbie? It was all just a lie and not worth my time or effort…but, as they say, hindsight is 20/20—and I actually AM in such a much better place right now….thanks!)
If I listen to people, to the way things ‘are supposed to be’…I would have killed myself YEARS ago…I am not saying this to be superfluous or catty—I am serious. I would have been so miserable before I even finished high school that I would never have made it out alive…much less into the college chosen for me…I would not have survived…literally.
So here’s to being more than glad…I do things MY way….
Oh--wait--I have a bonus one:
You must believe in my god the way I tell you to believe in him...come on...ask me about what the Church did to my mother? Let me tell you about some of the Cults I have known and loved, under the 'Guidance' of many 'gods'...oh please, oh please, let me give you my own personal first hand testimony about the evil things done in the name of 'God' and of 'Love' and of 'Goodness'....yeah--right....
One example, just one, which proves why so many people run from Christianity and their view of 'things'... a married couple attends this one BIG HUGE church, we are talking thousands of congregants every sermon, thousands, m'kay...they are extremely active in said church, on so many levels....they are there for years, m'kay. Then comes the divorce. The church asks the husband to leave the church so that there won't be any ill will within the congregation towards one party or the other, despite all the singles and divorced groups the church ran at the time--and still do, despite the other divorced couples still attending within the church, some w their new partners. It was made perfectly clear that under no circumstance should the husband come back to that church again. There is the perfect example of Christian goodness and Christian love, right there. Ain't it beautiful? Despite all the church itself preached--and continues to preach to this day--this is how they treat people, in the name of their God...yeah, baby...
Is religion--or politics for that matter--really a topic to get me started on? Especially so early in the morning, when my do I really care how other people take this o-meter is not on yet?
