The Knitting Journeyman

Gathering Up One Thread At A Time As I Weave This Web Of Mine.....

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Existing or Subsisting...and Everywhere In Between

So, I have been out trolling online today…trying to find interesting things to keep me busy while I wait the last few minutes before I can feed my daughter’s cyber dog on Farmville via facebook.  Please note…although I have been sending gifts for other facebook games, I don’t think I’ll be doing it anymore.
The deal w the games has always been my daughter can play whatever she wants on my facebook, so long as her schoolwork is done.  Well, schoolwork has been suffering of late…so, no games on facebook.  I’ve been sending gifts out, simply to make sure E was still in the loop when she came back to the games.  It doesn’t look as if she’ll be coming back any time soon.
Now, I do like to play Farmville myself now and then.  It’s mindless and stupid …and lets me stop thinking about everything, most of the time.  This is the only reason I am keeping it.
I really like this post by Nikki Matthews.  It struck a cord with me, with everything I have been writing about this morning.   It also intersects with the conversation I have been having off and on with R this morning as well.  Let’s just say it has something to do with loyalty between lovers and friends. 
But, as with all things, there are other things to see online.  My friend sent me this link first thing this morning.  Talk about people finding their bliss in their very own individual ways.  My friend and I have been having way too much fun at someone else’s expense via regretsy for the past few days.
It is however always nice to see when someone else can roll with the punches when they see the mistake they have made.  For example, this lovely lady.
I think I would prefer to stay with the whole Life Is Golden experience, via Nikki Matthews though.
Life is all about living.  Not about suffering.  Not about forcing yourself to do things day after day after day.  It’s not about allowing others to beat you down or put you in a box.  There are options.  You may not like the options.  You may not even be able to see them as options.  But they are out there.
A teacher of mine gave us an interesting example once, and I am SO paraphrasing and extrapolating on my own with this here.  Basically, a man has a job that he hates.  He feels he has to work this job because he has bills to pay.  He has kids to feed.  He has a wife.  He has the mortgage, the car payment.  He has responsibilities.  The thing is, he has chosen to accept these responsibilities.
No one says you have to keep paying for that house.  You can sell that house, buy another one.  Or rent an apartment.  Or live in your car.  You could give the house back to the bank and call it even.
You can turn off that phone, the internet, the satellite or cable television.  You can downsize.  You can sell all your stuff.  You can give it away.
You can take a lower paying job.  You can leave your wife.  You can stop paying all your bills.  You can call your credit card companies and make lower payment arrangements.  You can cut up all your credit cards.  You can do so many other things.
But every single morning, you wake up and you make your choice.  You decide, I am going to work today.  I am feeding the cat today.  I am paying for this house that is too big/too small/too whatever.  The weight of the world is on my shoulders.  That is your choice.
Did I say there would not be consequences for your actions?  No.  Your wife could take the kids and leave you if you quit keeping up the current style of living.  Credit card companies can come after you for what you owe them.  So on and so forth.   
But, there are so many other ways of doing things.  You do not have to be stuck where you are.  You can make other choices.
Instead of one full time job you hate, you could take two part time jobs you can deal with, or even love.  You can start your own business.  You can buy land and build your own house.  You can move far far away, or go back home. 
You have to decide, every minute of every day, is this what I want to do?  Is this what makes me happy?  Is this my only option?  Can I move forward from here?  Do I feel trapped?  Do I feel free?
Sometimes you really do need to throw all caution to the wind and just let fly.  Live your life.  If you don’t, no one else will.