I meant to write this yesterday, what with it being wishcasting Wednesday and all. Too many things kept cropping up and I let it go until today instead. So here we are.
Jamie Ridler is the most amazing WishMaster I have ever ‘met’. Every week she brings us a single question with which to challenge ourselves. Questions like:
These questions, and the so many other questions she has asked since I have ‘known’ her, are all so deceptively simple. Until you sit down, until you sit with the question, until that question begins to nibble at your heart and at your brain. Every week, for two years, perhaps more, I would sit down and I would chisel away at my Self, someone with whom I am not always that familiar, not after having been on the run emotionally for so long, after one divorce, two children, a break-up of the magnitude of a divorce, moving across country, and back again…
Every week, Jamie drew things out of me. Some I knew were there, buried and hidden. Some were complete surprises to me.
In the past few months, I have found a new footing. I have found a new grace, a new surety in and with myself. I have Jamie to thank for this.
And it is not just Jamie. It is the incredible and wonderful crew of wishcasters who every week would wish along with me, as I wished along with them. I have ‘met’ some very beautiful people. I have made some incredible friends. This I also thank Jamie for having brought into my life.
If it weren’t for Jamie, I would have never found the TextyLadies, even though they are currently on hiatus.
If it weren’t for Jamie, I would never have found the encouragement and muse superb of Sarah.
If it weren’t for Jamie, I would never have found out about Eric Maisel via Hybrid J, or zentangle, or a myriad of other things…thanks to Hybrid J.
I could go on and on about the beautiful people, the inspiring experiences, you name it…these above are barely a drop in the bucket.
Lately, I have not been participating as much online, with the group. Please do not get me wrong. Even if I do not post, I still light a candle and say a prayer for every wishcaster who makes a wish, whether online or not. I have always done this, simply because at times there is no way to get to everyone’s blog and read and post and still manage to get my own things done. And many, like me, do not always post on Wednesday, and I frequently do not remember to go back on Thursday or Friday to see who posted after I did.
For the past few weeks, every time I have sat down with the intention of answering this week’s questions…I have been stymied in a way…but in a beautiful and brilliant way…I’ve not been able to say I wish to do this…every time of late I’ve been able to say I am doing this…
If it weren’t for Jamie and for all the other wishcasters, I would never have stopped long enough to examine how I feel, what I want, where I want to go.
I would never have gotten into collage quite so deeply. I would not have allowed myself to start drawing…or painting…or open an etsy store…or set up my own anything…
If it weren’t for wishcasting, I don’t think I would have dared to stop working for some other company and strike out on my own. I wouldn’t be living my life on my own terms, to the extent that I am doing now. I wouldn’t be so convinced that I am doing the right thing, or heading the right direction.
I wouldn’t have allowed myself to look deep enough inside, to bring these things up and to the surface. I wouldn’t have had the strength to bring them into this world and bring them to fruition.
I am truly humbled and eternally grateful. Not just to Jamie. But to each and every single wishcaster out there.
Know that every week, I light a candle and say my prayer, for each and every one of you, each and every one of us, whether I am visible online or not.
Thank you. All of you.