I have to give the ex some credit. The man who can never be on time to save his life, ever.
Which has to be the worst pet peeve in my life. I can give you credit for five or ten minutes, especially if you apologize and say it was traffic, or the kids, or you got a late start, or anything at all.
This man never apologizes. Not ever. Not since I have known him.
When you say I will be here at 12N--I expect you to be there at 12N, give or take a few minutes. If you are going to be later than 5-10 minutes, you call. I do not expect to have to sit there til roughly 20 til 1P before I get ticked off and call you, to find out you are sitting around the corner doing jack squat. If I call you and it takes you less than two or three minutes to get to me, please tell me how that is not a complete slap in the face. It is rude and disrespectful and shows a distinct lack of empathy, compassion and the ability to follow through with the things you say you are going to do.
That is the ex for you, on a half-shell.
Which is why this past Sunday I nearly had a heart attack. We were dropping the kids off--and I had made a point of saying we had an appointment on purpose--because the ex could care less if I have to be at work at a certain time or not--he never has.
He was there at 12:30N.
Which was the time we told him we would be there. Actually we negotiated. We wanted to be there at noon, planning for his normal lateness and expecting him to show up around 12:30N anyway. He said 12:30N.
For the very first time in the past seven years that I have known him he was on time--he was there before we got there, and we were running a couple minutes late, two or three, due to weather and traffic--it was pouring down rain.
I could not believe my eyes. I was amazed. And awed.
Now, if he does it again, consistently, and keeps doing it for more than a week or two, then then I will be more than willing to say he is progressing, doing well, making an effort, all the nice things I would actually like to say now--but can't because I know his pattern is to change for a couple days, maybe a week or two, and then regress to whatever again.
But--he did do it once--and he deserves props just for that one single time.
He will get alot more if he can keep it up consistently.
It may scare him to hear this-but I am actually praying for the guy--if anyone needs it in this world, it's him.
I have to give him credit for doing it once. It's the only way to encourage him to keep doing it. To show how much it was appreciated.
So, thank you, for actually being there on time for the first time since I have met you.
That was really good of you.